Carol Kuykendall

Morning Musings

This is the view from my window early on a cold Colorado morning as I sit in my favorite spot at the kitchen counter, watching the sunrise slowly lighten the dark places in the valley. My hands are wrapped around my mug of warm coffee. Nearby is my computer, Bible, current favorite devotional book, and a messy pile of pens, highlighters, some sticky notes and an emery board. It is quiet and I’m musing.

Morning Musings is the name on a computer file that I open almost every morning. It’s the place I journal my random reflections. Thoughts that woke me up in the night. Or a question I can’t yet answer. A response to a scripture I’m reading. Writing these thoughts down helps me find myself; Morning Musings becomes the place where I can sometimes connect the dots and make sense of my life story.

I’ve also started collecting some photos in this file to remember the important story behind each picture. Putting words to each story secures its place in our family history.

I invite you to join me periodically in my Morning Musings as I share some of these reflections from this season of my life; from a place of perspective, looking back and looking forward. Also, read my reflections here that have been published on other blogs:
The Open Door Sisterhood: The Last First Day
Really: Doing Hard Things

Faith: “When did you become a Christian?”
For years, that question made me feel uncomfortable because I didn’t have a “when.” I didn’t even know I was supposed to have a “when.”

I came to Jesus slowly. So I don’t have a single moment when the pieces of the gospel message suddenly turned my darkness into light in a dramatic “Aha” moment with an out-loud confession of faith. I wish I’d had such a moment, like around a campfire at a weekend retreat, a memory I could claim as my “when.” I’ve heard pieces of the gospel message at different times in different places and believed what I heard. Such Truth brought more light into my understanding of faith.

I’ve been active in our local church; I participate in Bible studies and even do most of the homework. I easily talk to Jesus in prayer-conversations. Over time, I’ve learned more about what Jesus has done for me in his life, death and resurrection. I’ve been more able to accept his love and allow him to work in my life.

“When did you become a Christian?” My answer now has been shaped by my early mornings at my kitchen counter when I get up early enough to watch the sunrise. My faith journey is like a sunrise. I don’t exactly know when night becomes day. What I know is that Jesus is who He says He is and I’m walking in the light of the hope He gives me.

I also thank God that He starts each new day with the gift of a sunrise, a reminder of His Promise that the light overcomes the darkness. Always. But sometimes slowly.

“I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else.” C.S. Lewis

“…my God turns my darkness into light.” Psalm 18:28

Birthday Celebration

“Looks like you are serving a crowd!” the grocery checker said as she scanned box after box of plump fresh strawberries.

“My mother’s 100th birthday party!” I told her. “I’m making her special recipe for strawberry shortcake.”

“Wow! Good for her! I’m sure she’ll love it,” she smiled.

“Oh, she won’t be able to be there,” I said. “She died 35 years ago. “We’re celebrating all our memories and telling her stories so her grand and great grandchildren will know who she was.”

The checker, holding the last box of strawberries in midair, looked a bit confused but then loaded that box in my grocery bag. “That’s a nice idea,” she smiled. “A really nice idea.”

And so the next day, with lots of family help, I washed and hulled and mashed about a million strawberries, blew up lots of balloons, set the festive tables and 42 people from three generations came together for dinner and a birthday party with lots of memorable stories and heaping plates of strawberry shortcake.

The checker was right. My mom would have loved it. And it was a really nice idea.